Finances can be a very stressful thing to deal with in every aspect of life. Financial concerns can cause relationships to divide and can cause real harm to people. Financial mistakes can be detrimental to a family and their success. There are so many challenges that come along with finance and I think too few are prepared to face these challenges. I would like to talk a little bit about that today with the hope that I can help inspire you to prepare to address these concerns about finances that seem to be inevitable in the world today.
Something shocking that I learned is that psychologists routinely state that about 70% of divorces result from financial concerns; attorneys have stated that it is about 80%. Those numbers are insane to me! If finances are such a huge concern with the success of a marriage, why are we not learning more about it? I think this is so big that schools should be preparing kids to handle these concerns very early in life. I wish I had known about this earlier and been able to prepare more.
I believe one of the biggest reasons behind why finances can cause so much trouble is when there is a difference in opinion about how to make financial decisions. When a husband and wife are deciding how to spend their money and they have differing opinions, this can cause resentment. I think this is much more of an issue in today's society than ever before because of the focus that we have on money. We have lost important values in place of temporal things. This itself causes an enormous amount of issues beyond just financially.
In order to work through a difference in opinion about finances, it is important to understand the 2 different ways you can make decisions with your spouse. You can take the route that I think most have heard of and find perfectly acceptable, which is to compromise on both sides in order to satisfy, at least partially, both parties. This seems like the best option, but I have learned about an even better one. That is counseling with God through prayer in order to make a decision. God can act as the perfect middle man, not to choose who is right, but simply to state what He wants you to do, regardless of either person's opinion. When this characteristic of God is understood, making a decision based upon His direction will dispel any resentment or unfairness that may occur or be perceived in a disagreement and both people will go away feeling that the situation was fully resolved.
Finances can also become challenging as life progresses and things change. When unexpected events occur they can cause a lot of stress in a family that could result in a negative outcome for the family. The most obvious way to adjust for these possibilities is to prepare for them by discussing with your spouse what you will do in any possible situations you can think of and putting your plan into place. This can be making sure you have savings or making sure you have a backup plan. My church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, has always encouraged its members to budget and plan for unexpected challenges such as keeping a food storage for times of need. This has been a great blessing for my family personally because we have been in less than desirable situations where we had to rely upon our food storage to feed our family of 8.
I hope that I have been able to share some useful information with you all that will have sparked a desire to prepare for the challenges of finance in a marriage so that you can make your marriage stronger through these challenges rather than letting them tear your family apart.
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